dancing_crow: (headstand)
The news of my Da, on reaching their house this morning, was that he'd had a complete meltdown and tantrum on Sunday when Lucia was trying to talk on a zoom call with her cousins. Like banging his head on the wall and crying and banging on things ... Lucia still looked distracted over it, and still slightly shaken and also still kind of pissed off.

I had groceries to fetch so I bundled him into the car and took off across the bridge, headed for points east. We stopped for coffee at Esselon and I was so pleased to see them there I nearly cried - they have coffee and baked goods (implying that Woodstar is also baking at some level) and we visited briefly before I headed out. They are hoping to have the kitchen going for takeout in two weeks which would be May 18. I CANNOT wait.

We dropped grocs off at our house, and Al had a surreal conversation with my Da about Al's hair standing on end. I brought him home again, and visited a bit and then came home and started digging further holes in the garden. I am beyond weeding, and honestly have flown past gardening as well, and have started doing terraforming and pulling stumps. SO many things are coming out. it is gratifying and very hard on my back and legs. My neighbor brought over some asters and 'pie plant' whatever that is - something tall with yellow flowers - and those will go into the excavated holes.

And then, just for more things to do, I changed the sheets on Aerin's bed/the guest bed, and started thinning the herd of weirdly sized blankets. And made supper. I'm utterly beat.
dancing_crow: (headstand)
The Boston Bean (what DO you call your non-binary child? esp when they're a fully functioning adult and living with a partner and acquiring other partners as they go along? I have defaulted to skookum bean, as well as beloved child. Any additional suggestions will be taken under advisement) got an email from their landlord asking if they were doing ok, and they wanted to answer them with --ha ha, we need to pay less rent, this is going to be an issue, at least until the virus situation lifts and Jared can get work--  So we talked about phrasing and intent, and I helped them edit the final email, and they sent it out (after a minor panic over the subject line - it is always the last details that trip us up?) and then had to talk. So we talked some more and they are thinking about a cat, because soft and independent and also soft and cozy.

I sympathize. I would love to have a cat, or a dog or a rat, or .... almost anything, except I think about caring for them in old age and up to death and I just cannot. It is probably worse with dreading, but the idea of losing an animal i love is just one step too far, and I feel like I cannot do that any more. Which is abject cowardice on my part, but yes.
 
Alice and I continue to remove daylilies from the southwest corner and side of the house, along with removing false bittersweet as we go along. There are a LOT of them there. My plan for disposal includes driving around the block and tossing them into various ditches in the neighborhood, especially on relatively unobserved land. There is a fair amount of farmland nearby, I can get stuff into those ditches.

I think we might have accomplished sourdough starter? Or at least starter of some sort. I halved it yesterday, and fed it and put the other half in a bowl with water and more flour and hoped something might happen. More than 24 hours and a half cup of sugar later, it has become a fairly well risen sponge, and I might try to make pizza on it tonight.

Gaudior posted:

"But a thing that I keep noticing, and seems worth pointing out, is that everyone has some fairly familiar ways of being in pain, and those are what we end up with around this. If you hate yourself, you probably spend the plague thinking about how awful you are for not doing more to prevent it, and how badly you're dealing with it. If you're anxious, you're probably terrified right now, of getting sick, of someone you love getting sick, etc. If you're super-driven, you're probably overworking right now. If you normally dissociate, you're, like, fine right now, you guess, but for some weird reason you can't seem to get off the couch? "
 
and that right there is how I am. Fine, I guess? but everything is hard.

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