no matter where I go
Sep. 13th, 2023 01:58 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dancing_crowso.
I imprinted on Buckaroo Banzai pretty hard - I just loved so many things about it: the way it started in the middle of one adventure and carried on into about twelve others, the way the previous adventures were alluded to, and the in-universe tie-ins including albums and comic books and assorted scientific papers and all the backstory and sidestory... but what stuck with me (aside from a lingering fascination with Perfect Tommy and delight at beby Jeff Goldblum) was Buckaroo's phrase 'no matter where you go, there you are' which I had assumed to be about paying attention to your surroundings but increasingly I feel like it is a reminder that changes in location do not, in fact, change who we are. No matter where I go, it is still me when I am there. and me is boring right now.
I'd take to the sea, like old Ishmael, but that requires more planning and also maybe a ship wanting hands. Also I feel like I learned the hard way that I am kind of old and creaky for being on a ship with real comfort. It is more like camping, but I am fed. I like being fed. Maybe I should seek that out more, but INSTEAD I am heading out on a road trip. I am off to see friends, and catch up in person, and I am looking forward to it immensely.
I did make my boat sail, and I have realized it is now an ongoing project that will in fact never be done. I think that is the true nature of boats. I think it is amusing that the entire process of arranging the boat to sail consisted of drilling holes in things: in the top on the mast, at various places on the boom and yard, in the seat for some string to go through, and even in the stern of the boat to hold the hinges for the rudder (gudgeons) (the pins that go into them are pintles and they are on the rudder (the entire ship vocabulary is like this, from baggywrinkle to athwart and fathoms to fo'csle, and I revel in it?)) and frequently each of those holes required redrilling them, and spackling the ones I wound up not using. Not spackle, obviously, but a mix of epoxy and wood flour stirred to a peanut butter consistency and dabbed in (only from one side!! start on one side and push spackle into it until it comes out the other, or else you'll have air bubbles in the hole filling and that is inadvisable). I have sailed it a couple times. It still makes me nervous. I think I still need to adjust a couple pieces of it, to make the sail hang better and to make raising the rudder in shallow water easier. But also every time I take it out, it gets bashed up on something, so it actually does look old and beloved and less and less like the shiny and pristine object I launched 6 years ago. I think that is love. It is definitely use. If I left it unused, it would still be weathered, but I wouldn't have had any of the joy of using it, so I just need to come to grips with wear.
I was working moderately frantically at the end of august to finish some Gulf Stream prototypes - the work I was (theoretically) gathering data and impressions for on the ship this spring. I had thought I was supposed to be a part of a mentees' show at Zea Mays Printing but when I emailed the people I thought I was sharing the space with, they were not expecting me, and the director thought I had declined. (I had been a part of a previous group of three, and both of them dropped out in one week and I had to email my mentor and ask if it was me). I am certain I missed a bunch of memos, and I am honestly relieved to be off the hook for that. I needed more time anyways, although what I am doing with that time right now is a big fat nothing. Reading some romances. Doing some puzzles. and staring at the pile of things I could be doing.
-- I take it back - I am practicing making molds of things and casting them out of resin. I finally decided to actually do some learning about this, instead of just winging it with a slippery grasp on the mechanics. I found this delightful geezer on YT, Robert Tolone, who has been making molds and casting epoxy for decades and he is funny and has opinions and is working at pretty much precisely the scale and size I want to be and he had a backlog. So I am working on casting magic crystal acorns and small perfect bear figures (Alice did the originals, I am just messing about with casting). I am learning SO MUCH - already my work is better, cleaner, nicer. So far, most of the epoxy I've been using is left over from making the boat, which is a different kind of amusing.
I imprinted on Buckaroo Banzai pretty hard - I just loved so many things about it: the way it started in the middle of one adventure and carried on into about twelve others, the way the previous adventures were alluded to, and the in-universe tie-ins including albums and comic books and assorted scientific papers and all the backstory and sidestory... but what stuck with me (aside from a lingering fascination with Perfect Tommy and delight at beby Jeff Goldblum) was Buckaroo's phrase 'no matter where you go, there you are' which I had assumed to be about paying attention to your surroundings but increasingly I feel like it is a reminder that changes in location do not, in fact, change who we are. No matter where I go, it is still me when I am there. and me is boring right now.
I'd take to the sea, like old Ishmael, but that requires more planning and also maybe a ship wanting hands. Also I feel like I learned the hard way that I am kind of old and creaky for being on a ship with real comfort. It is more like camping, but I am fed. I like being fed. Maybe I should seek that out more, but INSTEAD I am heading out on a road trip. I am off to see friends, and catch up in person, and I am looking forward to it immensely.
I did make my boat sail, and I have realized it is now an ongoing project that will in fact never be done. I think that is the true nature of boats. I think it is amusing that the entire process of arranging the boat to sail consisted of drilling holes in things: in the top on the mast, at various places on the boom and yard, in the seat for some string to go through, and even in the stern of the boat to hold the hinges for the rudder (gudgeons) (the pins that go into them are pintles and they are on the rudder (the entire ship vocabulary is like this, from baggywrinkle to athwart and fathoms to fo'csle, and I revel in it?)) and frequently each of those holes required redrilling them, and spackling the ones I wound up not using. Not spackle, obviously, but a mix of epoxy and wood flour stirred to a peanut butter consistency and dabbed in (only from one side!! start on one side and push spackle into it until it comes out the other, or else you'll have air bubbles in the hole filling and that is inadvisable). I have sailed it a couple times. It still makes me nervous. I think I still need to adjust a couple pieces of it, to make the sail hang better and to make raising the rudder in shallow water easier. But also every time I take it out, it gets bashed up on something, so it actually does look old and beloved and less and less like the shiny and pristine object I launched 6 years ago. I think that is love. It is definitely use. If I left it unused, it would still be weathered, but I wouldn't have had any of the joy of using it, so I just need to come to grips with wear.
I was working moderately frantically at the end of august to finish some Gulf Stream prototypes - the work I was (theoretically) gathering data and impressions for on the ship this spring. I had thought I was supposed to be a part of a mentees' show at Zea Mays Printing but when I emailed the people I thought I was sharing the space with, they were not expecting me, and the director thought I had declined. (I had been a part of a previous group of three, and both of them dropped out in one week and I had to email my mentor and ask if it was me). I am certain I missed a bunch of memos, and I am honestly relieved to be off the hook for that. I needed more time anyways, although what I am doing with that time right now is a big fat nothing. Reading some romances. Doing some puzzles. and staring at the pile of things I could be doing.
-- I take it back - I am practicing making molds of things and casting them out of resin. I finally decided to actually do some learning about this, instead of just winging it with a slippery grasp on the mechanics. I found this delightful geezer on YT, Robert Tolone, who has been making molds and casting epoxy for decades and he is funny and has opinions and is working at pretty much precisely the scale and size I want to be and he had a backlog. So I am working on casting magic crystal acorns and small perfect bear figures (Alice did the originals, I am just messing about with casting). I am learning SO MUCH - already my work is better, cleaner, nicer. So far, most of the epoxy I've been using is left over from making the boat, which is a different kind of amusing.